I had a beagle named Marvin. He used to join in singing Happy Birthday and Old MacDonald any chance he got. He pursed his lips, threw back his head and let out that classic beagle howl. He even knew which parts were his and which were mine. We found out early on with him that he was also a beer thief. If you didn’t guard your beer carefully around Marvin, it wouldn’t take him long to sneak in and tip it over so he could lap it up. He could even maneuver a can out of those mesh cup holders you find in a lawn chair. Like I said, a filthy thief.
When you grow up on a farm and spend the majority of your day with animals, you learn quite a few things. The most valuable lesson I took away from those years is if an animal doesn’t trust you, neither will I. Animals know people. They can tell if you’re nervous, angry, happy or sad and they respond to those emotions accordingly.
Like Marvin, animals don’t hide their true natures. What you see is what you get. Now Marvin might have been a sneaky, little devil, but at least we all knew what his intentions were. He didn’t have any hidden agendas, he never pretended to be anyone but himself. He had a horrible singing voice, but he didn’t care. Singing gave him joy so he didn’t hold back. He knew he wasn’t supposed to have beer because it’s bad for him, but he also knew that to indulge yourself once in a while was all a part of living. And he understood there could be consequences from that indulging. Like the time he stole one too many and spent the following day hung over on the couch, grumpy as could be. But he accepted that too, as graceful as a beagle could be expected to.
I despise hearing the phrase, “you’re acting like an animal.” This phrase is used as an insult when it should be a compliment. Most animals, dogs especially, are loyal. They follow their true nature and live their lives to be of service to others. It’s instinctual to animals to help those in need. I think people have forgotten this somewhere along the way. We’ve become more and more focused on the “self” than those around us. In fact, when you walk into a bookstore or library there are shelves upon shelves of self-help books. And our ads are covered with how to do “self-care.” But how many of those books have a chapter on helping others? How many of those ads show us how we can support those in our communities?
I think what we need to discover is in helping others we inadvertently help ourselves. I have an anxiety disorder. Most days it’s bearable and I can find my own way. But a few years back I went through a very difficult time and for weeks felt very alone. My sister-in-law noticed something was off. She understood it because she had been there at some point in her life as well. The conversation that followed normalized what I was going through and gave me comfort. I never asked her personally if helping me helped her, but that conversation led to me sharing my story in front of about a hundred strangers at a conference.
When I was done speaking, a line of people formed to talk to me individually. Each person shared a bit of their story and how it was so refreshing to hear they weren’t alone in their struggles. Each story offered me a bit of my own healing.
Marvin the beagle understood this. When he made us laugh or performed a trick, it almost always ended in us giving him a treat or a pat on the head. He most likely didn’t enjoy balancing on his hind legs and spinning in circles like a ballerina; and as an introvert, I didn’t particularly enjoy speaking in front of a hundred people, but in doing so we both ended up providing that much needed “self-care” we hear so much about these days. So the next time you find yourself feeling sad, anxious or stressed out try acting like a loyal, selfless animal and see how it inadvertently helps you too.